i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
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