nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
