She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
i love accidental penises.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Randomize