Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
