Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
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The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
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uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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