Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
and she was petting her beer can
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
