Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
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its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
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three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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