Dual....:-)
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
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