I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize