It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize
