I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Randomize
