Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Randomize
