North Korea, Best Korea!
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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