ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
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