Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
