so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Your penis caused this!
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
