Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
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Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
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I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
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