That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
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