Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
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