There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize