But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Randomize