he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
