The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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