So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize