I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
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