she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
