office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Randomize
