Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Little spoons don't ask big questions
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
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