I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
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