There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
