If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
