the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
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