You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
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