I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.