just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
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Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
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I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I think he fucked my hip out of place.