i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.