Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Randomize