Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
