how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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