dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
