3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Randomize
