Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
