Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
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long story
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weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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