do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize
