i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Randomize
