I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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