About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
