Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
