i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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