Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Randomize
