its not stalking. its research.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
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My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
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I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
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