Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Randomize