You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
