she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
